A nation on the brink?

I’m in a deep sleep after a restless night with the baby waking constantly when the alarm goes off. Its 05.45, its dark outside and the rest the house is silent as they all sleep peacefully.

It starts with a heavy weight on my chest. The dread of the day ahead is present even though I’m not awake enough to start processing everything I need to accomplish today.

Slowly the information begins to flood my thoughts. Bags that need packing, uniform that wasn’t laid out the night before because I was too exhausted and an appointment for one of the kids – but I can’t remember which child and what the appointment is for.

I’m so anxious that the baby might be ill as I can’t afford to take any more time off of work.

I would love just another half an hour in bed but the mountain of chores I need to finish will not go away and I have a very limited amount of time to get everything done.

I need to be showered and dressed before 06.00 when one or more of the children will definitely wake and need me.

Between the hours of 06.00 and 07.00 when we leave to drop the children at the childminder there are three people to dress not including myself and five breakfasts to make, be eaten and then clear away.

My eldest is seven but has special needs and can sometimes require as much help as my two year old. My four year old is stubborn and sees everyone else being dressed by me or their dad and refuses to dress himself.

There’s no time to wash up. Bowls, milk bottles, coffee cups – all are thrown into the sink for later.

I read with the children last night but didn’t fill in their reading record books. I quickly scribble an illegible comment in both and shove them in their book bags with their library books that should have been returned on Friday – but I forgot.

One of them needs a cheque for a school trip and the other one has lost his drink bottle. I feel gratitude for free school meals saving me an extra 10 minutes on making packed lunches.

Getting everyone in the car takes longer than the journey to the childminder. I haven’t even thought about putting on makeup and I have a meeting first thing. Someone’s shoe is missing in the huge pile under the stairs.

I go and find a torch to search for it while my husband gets everyone’s coats down for them. I breathe a sigh of relief once everyone is strapped into their car seats and we are driving towards the childminder’s house.

I have less than two minutes to do a hand over to her explaining that the baby is teething and hand over some calpol. I kiss all my children goodbye.

‘My time’

The drive to the train station is my time I spend adjusting from mother of three to employee and I allow myself to think about everything I need to do in my time at the office.

Finding a parking space is awful. Luckily we aren’t late today and manage to get parked on a residential street within walking distance. The train station car park is too expensive and we can’t afford to pay for parking on top of our train fares and childcare fees.

The platform is heaving and I realise there is a problem with the trains. The one before ours has been cancelled. I have a meeting – I can’t be late – so I cram myself in to the sweaty, overcrowded train and try to find something to hold on to.

The journey is 40 minutes and the train only gets busier as it nears Euston station. It’s too crowded to hold on to anything let alone read the paper and get an idea of the day’s news agenda.

I usually work on the commute managing to get through most of my emails but today it is so crowded I can’t even reach for my phone in my bag.

Once I’m at Euston the feeling of sicky panic subsides a bit as I now just have a 10 minute walk until I am at the office and I might get time to read through some emails before I have to be in my meeting.

“That’s just the start of my day,” says Laura. A part-time working mother of three.

“I always feel like I am starting the day on the back foot and under prepared. I’ve spent half of my adult life stressed, anxious and even depressed,” she added.

But Laura isn’t alone. Every two minutes someone in Britain is made ill at work by stress.

According to a new TUC study stress now accounts for 39 per cent of work-related illness and 11.3m lost work days.

“I know I’m one of the lucky ones too,” says Laura.

“My boss is also a parent and understands that family life sometimes spills in to the workplace and can affect our productivity,” she added.

The TUC study warns that the mental symptoms of stress range from sleeplessness and listlessness and can lead to clinical depression and even suicide.

“Sleeplessness is a big problem for me,” says Laura.

“Even the prospect of a sleepless night is enough to keep me awake. But mostly I worry about work.

“When the children were born I reduced my hours so I could have some time with them but fitting all of my work in to my part-time hours just heaps more stress on me,” she added.

Worn out

TUC general secretary Frances O’Grady warned that bosses must stop treating worn-out staff like machines.

“Much more needs to be done to stop bosses treating their staff like machines,” said Frances O’Grady.

“It’s in no-one’s interests to have stressed-out workforces,” she added.

Women are more susceptible to stress and metal health illness than men with four in 10 believing they’re on the brink of burnout.

“The stress of constantly trying to balance my workload and my home life had a serious effect on my health last year,” said Laura.

“I was signed off work for three months by my GP with stress, anxiety and depression,” she added.

One in four British workers have taken time off work for stress – but more than half of those hid it from their colleagues.

“During that period when I should have been focusing on getting better I spent a lot of time worrying about my return to work,” said Laura.

“I knew colleagues would ask what had been wrong and I felt ashamed and weak for needing this time off when they’d managed to cope ok,” she added.

Though men were found to suffer higher rates of alcoholism, drug and anger issues women experience between 20 and 40 per cent more mental ill health than men.

“I worried that my boss would be too nervous to give me any of the more challenging projects in case it over stretched me again or that he might just think I am not up to it anymore,” said Laura.

“I worried that I would now forever be overlooked for promotion having a permanent ‘black mark’ with HR as someone who wasn’t rock solid or reliable,” she added.

According to official figures around 244,000 new cases of work-related stress, depression or anxiety were diagnosed in the UK last year, which equates to 668 a day.

“It’s important to recognise the signs and get help as soon as you think you might be suffering from stress, anxiety or depression,” says Laura.

“I tried to struggle on for too long and by the time I sought help I had reached burnout and had a breakdown,” she added.

Recognising the signs – are you at risk?

 

If you wake up feeling exhausted and remain tired for the duration of the day, you have a frequent sense of dread, no matter how much you do you have a constant sense of underachieving, you’re constantly ill, you feel irritable, anxious, sad and hopeless or you have lost you appetite – these could all be signs that you’re suffering from stress.

“My breakdown has taught me a lot,” says Laura.

“I’ve tried to make some changes in my life to help take some pressure off,” she added.

Getting enough sleep, staying hydrated and exercising for 20 minutes a day all help to relieve stress.

“But people shouldn’t be afraid to go to their boss and tell them they’re stressed. Nothing will get better unless employers realise their employees’ limits,” she added.

Sweden is moving towards a standard six hour work day, with some businesses across the country having already implemented the change.

The philosophy behind the move is that because the working day has been condensed, staff will be more motivated and have more energy to get more done in a shorter period of time.

“I think a six hour working day is a brilliant idea,” said Laura.

“I find that by the end of an eight hour day I am just not focused and although I try to use every minute I have productively I just don’t produce my best work at the end of a long shift,” she added.

Reports so far show that not only has productivity stayed the same but there are less staff conflicts because people are happier and better rested.

“People want to spend more time with their families,” said Laura.

“The time I do have with mine is precious and I want to make happy memories for us all,” she added.